Friday, June 17, 2011
I have a few friends that have identified with the dark place of depression. It appears quite a few friends found themselves in this same dark neighborhood. We tend to beat ourselves up when we are in it. It has a lot to do with the depression and the self hatred - I think it is ugly and horrible vicious cycle of nastiness. That's what I think anyway. I'm no shrink - I just know my own world - VERY WELL.
I'm happy to say that since I told my self to let it go and to learn to love me I've been staying in the light, or light gray part of my world. I know the dark is there - I mean RIGHT there, but I can also see that I can stay in the light and just wave to the dark. I guess you can say flirt with the darkness, or it flirts with me.
I have noticed that we tend to tell ourselves that we are wallowing or rolling around in self pity or self hatred, which of the two I would agree with the later. However, I do not agree with self pity. I'll tell you why. If any one of our friends or loved ones was depressed we would not tell them to "stop feeling sorry for themselves." No, we would comfort them and be there for them. Be a friend, a loved one, or even a lover. We would not be ugly and tell them to "STOP, their stupid whining..."; "Get out and quit feeling sorry for themselves..." No, we would not be so mean, or ugly to them.
So, why are we to ourselves? Who do we think we are to be so cruel to our number one. The one we came into the world as, and the only one that will be with us when the lights go out permantely? No, what we need to do is tell ourselves just exactly what we'd tell someone else - "I LOVE YOU" "I'm here for you" "I won't leave you, talk as long as you need." Create a journal, and allow us to love ourselves. Why is it wrong? Who is the first one to tell us that it is wrong to care about ourselves? Why is it? It's not selfish - it is necessary for us to live, breathe, and function in this world.
So, go out - but first stop by the mirror and tell that amazing person looking back at you that you LOVE that person - and MEAN it!