Tuesday, February 15, 2011

How will you be remembered?

Have you ever asked a friend or love one to describe you – honestly? I did yesterday. I like to know how others see me. I want to be sure I’m being kind and loving, honest and real with not only my friends and family, but with the rest of the world too.

Growing up I remember my Mom telling us stories of how her father would get out of the car after yelling and screaming at her Mom, her and her sister. He would then walk up to a stranger, greet them friendly and smiling. She told me that rocked her to her core every single time he did it, which was often. My Mom grew up with a physically, verbally and emotionally abusive father. That is a person I didn’t want to become – ever.

I know my path in life is a lesson of love. It’s that simple – LOVE. Teach it to the world. So, I try to be kind, funny, silly at times, but always loving to everyone. Yes, I do get stepped on often, but that’s not going to change who I am. I want to personify love. It’s important to me, very important.

I have had some horrendous things happen to me in my life. Recently, I had to tell my superiors at work about one of them. My immediate supervisor told me that he was quite shocked that happened to me in life because of how I am. (He gestured at all of me. LOL!) I smiled at him and told him, “The things that have happened in my life have made me who I am. They have allowed me to see people where they are, not where I expect them to be.”

The photo to the right here was painted in 1959, and is in the medical facility in Heidelberg. I wonder if it was painted by a soldier, civilian, or a hired artist. I wonder what the person was really like in life. His painting is beautiful. It’s chipped and peeling on the bottom, but the painting is beautiful over all. I stood in front of it and wondered about the person that painted. Who was he? What was he like? Did he like doing this, or was it just a job? How do his friends and family remember him? This led me to think about how others see me again.

Well, the other day I asked my daughter to describe me in a completely honest way. I was prepared for the worst. My daughter is very honest – it’s what I truly love about her. She’s an incredibly quiet and passionate woman, who is not afraid to tell it like it is. Well, the first word out of her mouth was “quirky.” Can I tell you how much I LOVE that word?!?! She went on to say”, …kind, funny, loving, always willing to help others, you always tell people the truth, while not ever meaning to hurt them – you tell them the truth none the less. You’re silly, funny, creative and fun.” This was so refreshing to hear. I asked her – “Am I mean, hurtful, selfish or unkind?” She came back with “No.”

It’s odd how we see ourselves at times. I see myself as selfish, mean and sometimes unkind. Apparently, self is much harder on us than truth, reality and how others see us. This really did surprise me. I’m happy with how I’m perceived, but now I have to learn to see me that way as well. All the while continuing to be how they see me, and of course to keep on LOVING the world.

How do you want to be remembered? If you’re not living as you should – change it. It only takes 21 days to make a behavior a habit. You can do it. 21 days is such a short amount of time in a lifetime.

Love passionately!
Love without regret.
Love where THEY are, not where you want them to be.

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